Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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