Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
