So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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