Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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