I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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