I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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