How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
