i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
