It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
