That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
