he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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