so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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