Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
