The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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