$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize