I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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