oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
