Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
