love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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