He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Let's paint friendship bongs
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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