Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
