So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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