Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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