If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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