Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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