I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
