I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
