SEEEEXXX PLEASE
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
