I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
