i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
