Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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