You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
