we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
