Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
is it fun? or sober?
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