You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize