Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
