is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
