haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
