was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
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