I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
