i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
third nipple confirmed
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
