I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
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