I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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