Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Randomize
