why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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