all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
