talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
