I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
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