No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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