oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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