ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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