Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
